SB: Hahahahaha. You’re kidding, aren’t you? What ever made you think I was sane? Is that one of those cheap interviewer tricks?
Oh, wait. You’re serious. That’s one of the real questions (not like the “Are you ready?” throw-away you wouldn’t let me answer). Okay, I’ll reveal the real truth about Mr. John “JAM” Arthur Miller and Mr. Kevin Balls Wallis.
Just not today.
2-MD: New breakfast cereal idea: collect the tissue that is removed from the roofs of peoples’ mouths when eating Cap’n Crunch and sell it as “Cap’n’s Scrapins” Are you on board? Any marketing stategeries?
SB: Well, if you deep fry it, you could call it “Cap’n’s Cracklin’”
2-MD: We have certain information about you, Ms. Babcock, obtained somewhat unscrupulously but information nonetheless, that the novel and film “The Black Widow” was based on your life. What do you say to these charges?
SB: Another cheap interviewer trick. You’ve been peeking. But I found your little camera bug thing.
Just you wait, Mr. Lowe. Through advanced technology known only to the insane, and only to the insane who work with JAM and Ballis, I was able to reverse the nuerofibers in the bug and can now watch YOU. Mwahahahahah. (2-MD: Ya know, we were just thinking that it always feels like somebody’s watching us.)
2-MD: Fred or Barney?
SB: Dragons taste a lot better than cavemen. So Barney. Definitely.
2-MD: What is your biggest regret? (No, you can’t say ‘Having children.’ That’s too easy.)
SB: That my name isn’t Steve Lowe. Then I could write strange interviews, too, and GET AWAY WITH IT. (2-MD: What a suck-up. That’s OK, though, we like suck-ups here.)
Congratulations, Sue! You made it through the entire interview without us once making a lewd reference to your last name! (oops… nevermind) (SB: HEY! What’s wrong with my last name? Well, actually, it’s not MY name. Not even my hubby’s. Just a random name picked out of … never mind) Sue’s hard work has been borne out across the Internets in places like Silver Blade and Liquid Imagination Issue 5. We suggest you go there lest you incur the wrath of the Black Widow.